More Like my Mom Everyday

People tell me I look like her and that I agree with. We do have the same sense of humor. I thoroughly enjoy her company. I just keep noticing I am more like her. Its in the stupid things I do. For example, I was driving back to work from lunch thinking about what i needed to do the following day to prepare for my cousin to take care of the boys. So as I am driving I just turn into the development my aunt lives in. It was like my brain just thought about my cousin and turned to go to her house. What the heck??? I have lost my mind. I had to u-turn out of there. I find myself putting things in safe places so I can find them later. Do you think I can find them? I threw away my debit card the other day. It was in the bag from Walgreen's...just like my mother. On Christmas Eve we had rented videos. Nate was playing with them. He had them one minute and poof gone. I swear I had no clue where they were. I convinced myself I picked them up and threw them away. I went through the trash three times. That little booger "put them away" in the shelf where the DVDs go. So smart. May point is that things I made fun of mom about are now happening to me! Children...they steal your heart and your brain!!! Loving every minute....sometimes all I can do is laugh...call my mom and say..." you will never believe what I did!"

Will they always be sick???

They have snotty noses again! These poor kids. They run the opposite way when they see me with the tissue. I used an old burp cloth today...they had such red noses. I think it saved them a little pain. They dont have an infection and they are good spirited. They just have a river of snot coming from thier nose, a cough, watery eyes, and sneeze, sneeze, sneeze. I wonder if it is an allergy of some sort. I gave them breathing treatments today too. I can hear James getting that barky cough. I just pray this is not the winter I am going to have. I am staying close to home the next few days so we can enjoy Christmas. Merry Snotty Christmas!!!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!

Today

We made it out the door with naps under our belt. Made sure some medicine was flowing through their veins to prevent runny noses. Wanted to get some Christmas shopping done. They fussed all the way to the stores and I thought why do i do this to myself? Why do I even leave the house? It is a stressor to me and today I was just so worn out. I also thought if I don't take them out then they will never know how to act and going out will ALWAYS be an issue. We got a good parking space. I tried to get the stroller set up and couldn't. It was stuck. So i had a bright idea. I will rent a double stroller in the food court. The best four dollars ever spent. They were precious. I did keep them entertained for a long while with little bags of cereal but who cares. They stayed in the stroller, said hello, no tears. We had one little episode of choking in Stride Rite but you know we cant go one trip without something. We ran into this lady my mom knows and she asked my mom if i was marred to a black man. Mom told her yes and she then tells mom she thinks people should stay within their race...black with black and Chinese with Chinese. My mom just smiled at her and thought you ignorant woman. Who says these things out loud??? IGNORANT PEOPLE!!! Stride Rite is always an ordeal because I can not plan. You see taking my children out involves planning. I know what i need. i make the plan go in get and get out....do dilly dallying. Well at stride rite I have to think about the shoes. I don't know what they will have. At least they did not have to be sized....6.5 shoes...growing so big...anyways....my kids insist on sticking all of their food in their mouth like it will be taken or something...thus choking. i dug out the cereal and all was well. i certainly did not want the throw up episode i had first thing in the morning...strawberry milk all over... gross...
After the outlets we went to Toys R Us...where Nate got a case of the want it...this was surprising to me...he is barely 18 months...are we there already????...I had a plan though...got what i needed and left...Then we headed to McDonald's...they did not use high chairs..they sat in the booth...well stood/kneeled and ate like big boys and then we headed to Grandmas to play and visit Granddaddy..they just ran all over...you to figure sitting still for 3 hours is a big deal...

Overall decent day...i have few more Christmas things and then I am done...Now they are resting peacefully upstairs...hoping the runny noses is related to cold weather...good night all !!!

Possible Resolutions

.....I want to get back to reading...reading that adds something to my brain and life

.....I want to keep up the working out...make sure it is part of my schedule

.....I want to put some organization to my photos and keep up on ordering them

.....I want to make sure I get an external hard drive and back up our computer

.....I want to get a printer and get back to coupon clipping

.....I want to be more of an encourager...send cards...leave messages...this is good for others and me

.....I want plan some good trips with kids for the spring/winter/summer

.....I want to go away with my husband for a night....leave our kids and just be together

.....I want 2011 to be better than 2010

Thankful

......for children that come in pairs

......for health

......for stable employment

......for wonderful daycare

......for tickles that cause uncontrollable laughter

......for a husband that does the dishes

......for Yo Gabba Gabba...it gives me sanity at times

......for a God who knows exactly what I need and at what time

GUESS WHO IS WHO!!!!!!

Seriously????

I ran out of gas after I got out of work today. I got up this morning knowing I had little gas but I thought I do not have time. I will get after work. So after work I look down and say to myself...gas...I am driving...waiting in traffic to turn on route 9 and then BAM...no movement...line of traffic behind me. So embarrassed...one guy came up and helped me move it... and then one of my sweet patients came up. He lived really close by. He got a gas can and we got gas and I was like 20 minutes late to pick up the kids...never a dull moment. I like to keep it interesting... I love my life!!!!

Imperfections

I forever grateful for the grace of my Jesus. He just fills in the spaces...my imperfections. I went to this women's conference with my church last week. There was this song about our flaws. That got me thinking about all my flaws and how really I am just trying to be ok with them. I went out to dinner tonight without doing my kids hair. My mom says..."why didn't Mommy calm your hair down?" I said , "Mommy is happy she got out the door." I am flawed. This makes me all the more thankful for my Maker. He never makes me feel less or judged. It's like he just lets me be me and when I screw up he doesnt have to beat me up about it over and over. He just gently prods me...ok sometimes smacks me...but I need it and when I am smacked. I dont do it all right all the time. I dont brush my kids teeth because I dont want to fight with them. I curse...a lot. I sometimes don't do all the reps in my sets when I work out. I let my kids eat food that fell on the floor. I drive my car practically on empty and I have ran out of gas many a day in life. I pay my bills late from time to time. I sometimes shove my husband at night because I just want some space. Despite all these shortcomings my Jesus is still ok with me. Now this thought does make me complacement. It actually spurs me on to be more. I know that he fills in the holes only to make me desire more for myself. I have this overwhelming feeling at the destiny he has for me. I see how Jesus is working out all these little things to fulfill his plan for my life. I just love it. It is so freeing. I admit all this to let people know I am flawed and I am working on being ok with it. Thank you Jesus

Having Kids Changes Everything

It amazes me the adjustments you make in life when you have kids. I was a woman who had pedicures, hair cuts, and quality hair care...you know 10 dollar shampoo. Well now I spend my money on diapers and kids clothes. You really dont even think about it...it just happens...and then you wake up one day and you have not had a hair cut for like 3 months. I was a person who said I was not ready for kids because I was too selfish. I think we are all too selfish...but then these special little people come into your life and shampoo and haircuts are so not important. My husband and I are amazed at parents who really are not parents. Its like thier kids are just along for the ride of thier life rather than building thier lives around thier kids. They have thier kids out at 9pm. They still go to clubs. I mean who are these people? I am so thankful for the time and effort we have put into our boys. It pays off in the long run. People say...they are so good natured...why? I believe it is because we have adjusted to them. My obgyn used to laugh at us...he would say...you all act like these kids are gonna have to adust to you...you need to adjust to them. Well we have done that and honestly would never change a thing. We desire no clubs...no late night dinners with screaming kids. These children have opened up our hearts and eyes. They have demanded almost all of us. Never trade it ever. Thank you Jesus!!!

why so big so fast

Dear James and Nathanael,

You are growing too big too fast! Your mommy wants to keep this time all bottled up. You are looking like young little boys and not babies. You bless my hear with your smiles and giggles. It is amazing to see your personalities shine through. God is so amazing to make you from the same womb but so night and day. You are growing so big. Mommy has been pleased this first year. You make me so tired some days and I wonder how I will be when you really start moving. Promise me you will always kiss mommy with the big kisses you give now. Promise you will always want to be held at least one in a while. Promise me you will keep the sparkle in your eyes that you have now. Sometimes late at night I go into your room, sit in the rocker, and pray over your futures. Oh how the Lord will bless you. Open your hearts to him and I promise He will give you all you want and need. Well boys it is has been a fabulous first year! Cant wait for the rest.
Love,
your mommy

Just One Hour is all I ask for

I am excited today because my carpet is getting cleaned. So I came home early to get started on clearing and cleaning. Now my husband was on his way out the door for a late shift at work. He asks do i have to take the boys to daycare. I say yes...I need some peace...he says put em their beds..honestly will that be peace...now they will moan and cry to be free....all i want is an hour...we paid for it already....now i get my hour...the laundry is started ...the toys are picked up...the floors are clear to be cleaned....honestly i don't want my hour to take a shower...do my nails...nothing like that. I just like to get my little house in order. I take this time to get my weekend started. Do husbands not get that every hour of our day is spoken for? If i am not wiping butts or noses of my own two little rascals... I am solving the issues of my veterans....who are a lot like 1 year olds if I might add...so here I am awaiting my carpet cleaner...no complaints...just thankful to have a daycare to drop em for an hour. I just don't get how my husband thinks work can be done with our children in the house...i just enjoy walking around with no baby gates or saying ...NO NO...ahhhhh peace...it is just an hour!

We are not invincible

How old are you when your friends begin to die? I don't think I am old...I feel old some days but even when we sing at church about a generation rising up I sometimes think it is us. I have had one friend die from cancer: JR Butcher. He was a dear friend. We had lost contact but we had reconnected through Myspace and then he got sick again and BAM! gone. Now I have lost again. Chad Hammond. He has been sick for awhile and I know he was tired. I know he is with Jesus but I just think are we now this old? It scares me. Our lives are gone so quickly. This scares me...BIG TIME!

It's about that time

Its about that time of the day where I get so excited. I like to work. It give me a chance to feel human and honestly it makes me appreciate my family so much more. It gets to about 3:30 and I literally watch the clock. I get to leave at 4:00 and start my real job...being a mommy. I love to go get my boys. They sometimes scream with excitement to see me. My heart is so blessed. I am so glad to have a job that I can turn off at 4:00 and go home. Now my boss came by the other day and was like I came by around 4:10 and you weren't here. I was like of course...I get off at 4:00. I just love to be a mommy and honestly working has made me so thankful for it. To all you stay at home mom's hats off to you!

NEW PICS AND VIDEO

I used to be.......

I used to be a woman who wore make up, now I wear spit up.
I used to be a woman who watched tv shows religiously, now I dvr it all
I used to be a woman who cooked amazing meals for my hubby, now he's lucky to get soup and a sandwich.
I used to be a woman who never had smudges on her glasses now there are tiny finger prints all over them
I used to be a woman who tended to her cat's every need, now she's lucky to get food and water once a day.
I used to be a woman who bought groceries on a whim, now it's a great under taking...lists, daycare, and COUPONS!
I used to be a woman who lived by herself, now I come home to a family.
I used to be a woman who had her job and that is what defined her, now I am defined by these special boys.
I used to be a woman who thought she was happy now I know true happiness.
Thank you Jesus for change and bringing these men to my life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sister

My sister came to visit me this week. Thank the Lord. I love her so much. She is truly by best friend. I get sad to think she lives 8 hours away. Its funny we haven't always been this close. Its like we are experiencing things for the first time together. She has a 1 year old and is in her first year of her second marriage. I have two 9 months old and in my second year of marriage. She had 4 children before Abby but her youngest was 16 before Abby came. She said having Abby is like having a baby for the first time because there was never all this stuff for kids there is now. We spent our visit shopping...visiting...and watching our kids play. Abby stays at home with mommy all day so the adjustment of having other kids touch her and her stuff was an experience. I loved the faces she made at the boys like, "who are you and why are you in my space." My boys just ignored her...to funny. Its funny when you have kids no one really wants to be your friend. When you get married there is the adjustment of not being single. You start to do things with people who are also married and then you have kids and bam...you are nobody. I guess people assume you are busy or maybe they don't want to be around your kids. So my sister and I are close because we don't have someone everyday to talk to and just discuss everyday life. Don't get me wrong I have friends but things are way different than what they were before. I am in no way complaining. I just find it humorous that people somehow assume i am this woman who doesn't want to hang out...have a drink...get dinner. I am human people. To all my friends who still hang out with me. Thank you....my husband is grateful because without you I would be insane. And to my sister: i long for a day that we can spend the day shopping together...drinking margaritas...and then one of us pack up and go home and it not take 8-9 hours...i love you and miss you!

Geting out of the house

Getting out of the house is quite a battle in the Riley household. This past Saturday I knew I was not going to be at the house all day. This snow was driving us nuts. My mother and I decided to make a day of it and take the boys shopping, to lunch, and everywhere until they screamed their heads off. Now to be gone all day you must do multiple things:

1. Morning Nap- usually around 10:00am. The boys must have this or they will be bears. When they wake up from this it is like a brand new morning. They are bright eyed...bushy tailed...and good for mama

2. Packing the Diaper bag. Now this is an art form. You have to remember formula and food. You have to bring bottles, bibs, spoons, snacks, and baby food. Then you pack diapers. Make sure you have enough..wipes...extra clothes...burp cloths...blankets...and the essential toys...The boys need entertainment if people watching becomes boring. Now this is a lot of one child...let alone two...so i have two diaper bags at this point... food bag and then the bag we carry in and out of places.

3. Car Seats...cleaned...adjusted and ready to hold children

4. Clean up the children-make em smell good...do their hair so they don't look like fuzz balls...change their clothes....wash their faces...

Now if you can do all this and remember to brush your teeth and put on clothes...you are successful.
So last Saturday...I did it...got em packed...out the door and by the projected time I told my mother. We went to lunch... the boys sat in highchairs and ate...they were perfect...we shopped and shopped...they sat like big boys in the Target carts...They were so excited... i was thinking to myself... a successful day...I remembered everything...since last time I had to buy bottles to feed them because i remembered it all but the bottles... then it happened...

My mother says to me..."Is your shirt inside out?"

Now this is being asked of me in the check out line at Target. We have been together for 6 hours at this point. We are at our last stop...going home...

I say..."No...of course not!" I reach to check my tag...and sure enough of this mother is wearing her shirt inside out...I just laugh to myself...my mom then asks

"aren't you going to the bathroom to switch it?" I tell her.."If i have made it this far then I can last the rest of the ride home."

I have to laugh to myself on this one...some would be mortified...but I am thinking...That was a successful day...I got out the door...remembered everything... my boys never cried... no puking...I had a great lunch and I found some good deals...now the least of my worries is my shirt being inside out...i find success just to be wearing a shirt.

Seriously...more snow

Just when i was out and about...more snow comes...so here we are snowed in again...it's like a blizzard out there. Its blowing everywhere....i dont think we will ever get out this time...

Both of them are crawling now which makes us having to watch them like hawks. i have come to the conclusion that we should just remove everything from this room this would just simplify life at this point.

Nathanael is coughing again so we have done breathing treatments all day. I feel like we have the cold that just wont let them be. Thier noses run and run...we wipe and wipe...they cry and get frustrated... poor things...good thing i got puffs plus at sams club....none of these are complaints...they are happy and actually healthy...i can handle snotty noses and coughs...

Snowed in

Well there is like 36 inches of snow outside. My husband has been amazing. He has shoveled us out and now we are waiting for the plow. I like to leave the house once a day and i am not sure if that will happen at all this weekend.

Today has been ok though. The boys slept good....3 naps!!! So lucky on that one. James is crawling like crazy. It's military crawl but he can move. The poor guy...he bears on one side more than the other so his arm is all rubbed up from the carpet...Nate on the other hand is moving slower...he has more to move. Today though he wiggled to get what he wanted. He got himself under the tv stand but wined and wined to be let out. I was like kid...you got yourself there...here is a picture of that...you had to help him...how precious is that face????

5 things people say and the answers I sometimes say

1. Are they twins???
My answer: No I had one and hurried up and had another
2. Wow...Twins...better you than me
My answer: Thankfully it was me and not you
3. Did you have them naturally??
My answer: Yep we did it the old fashioned way (people are asking if we had invetro)
4. How do you do it with twins?
My answer: Welll you know how it is with one...imagaine if you did the one...and then just had to repeat the whole process again...change, feed, play...change, feed, play
5. Oh you poor thing...two babies!!!
My answer: There is no poor thing here...i am blessed and forever grateful!!!

NEVER A DULL MOMENT

So my husband broke his fibula at work. For those that have no idea what that is it is the back bond of the two bones that are on the bottom of the leg. It runs down down the calf. He was chasing a "perp" at work. I talk to him one moment he was picking up Chinese for dinner and within 20 minutes I get the text "i hurt my foot." He thought he sprained his ankle but the next day the doctor tells him broken bone. He was walking on it and everything. So for the past week i have done it all. He will change a diaper and hobble to the kitchen to feed em but everything else...me. So i ask him...when this is over honey what will you do for me to make up this. He says...I took care of you while you were pregnant. Somehow that is not even. We didn't have kids then

So i am not complaining honestly I love every second with these Riley boys. They are doing new stuff every day. Nate waves bye bye...Bird started to do the same this weekend. My mom thinks she taught them that. Bird is doing the military crawl...he grunts the whole time. It is hilarious. I love it. Wondering what will be new this week. Here are some recent pics:

I think I will scream

How can a few hours it just all fall apart and i am thinking....I need a pill...quiet...a cigarette...something!!!!!!!!!!! Nathanael has RSV. He is improving but now James is acting like he has it too. The breathing machine is not working. i called the company. They have a on call service. They are telling me there is a little piece that goes in the medicine holder. I am like there is not anything in the box. So now they are on the way to the house. I am wondering much that will cost. James has cried and coughed. I got some Tylenol in him for pain and he has passed out. He has not had cereal or bottle so not sure how long he will sleep. The poor little guy he was barking and barking and you can tell it was really hurting his throat. So i am driving home from my mom's with a crying baby in the back and a broken breathing machine thinking..."I cant do this again." I call my husband and just cry and cry. He of course is calm and all i can tell him is come home as soon as possible. I mean people ask how do you do it with twins. I just say, "oh its not that bad." Honestly...it is bad when it is bad. I get home...unpack the boys..put James to bed...put Nate in the bouncy and my cousin calls. She is crying in CVS because her boyfriend had a car accident with her son in the car. They are all alright but she has having that moment oh crap..it could have been worse. I then have to suck up all my tears because I am reminded that really these issues will pass and i needed to not focus on me. I gave some words of encouragement and pray. I gather myself and the urge for pills and cigarettes have passed. I then feel the pangs of hunger and realize i have not ate since lunch and it is 9pm. Then my husband calls and says..."whats up?" If he even had a clue!

Cable Bill

So my husband thinks that we should turn off the cable in order to save money. I am fearful of this. I mean television is the one thing I do to unwind...mindless television. We DVR a lot of stuff because honestly we don't have time to watch shows...then when we get the one minute to ourselves we spend it watching TV. Jim seems to think that turning it off will save money and gives the time to do other things. Well today i decided to go along with it. I think it will be good for me. Honestly I feel a little convicted. I am thinking turning it off will allow me to have time to read, study the Bible, work on this blog, work out, and get to bed on time. So now it is just the part of making the phone call.

Giving it a Try

I like to read people's blogs...I follow them but don't make comments. Is this stalking behavior??? So I was thinking that maybe blogging would be fun for me. Weird things happen to me that would make good stories. I am raising twin boys. I am married to an amazing man that makes me laugh out loud. I work full time. I try to live simple but honestly the Lord finds it in his heart to have funny thing happen to me. They are just little blessings. I think blogging this life of raising twin boys... the Riley boys...could be fun too. So here is my attempt. Don't think I will be a daily blogger but will try my best.